All about breasts…
How beautiful you are, my darling!
Oh, how beautiful!
Your eyes behind your veil are doves.
Your hair is like a flock of goats
descending from the hills of Gilead.
Your teeth are like a flock of sheep just shorn,
coming up from the washing.
Each has its twin;
not one of them is alone.
Your lips are like a scarlet ribbon;
your mouth is lovely.
Your temples behind your veil
are like the halves of a pomegranate.
Your neck is like the tower of David,
built with courses of stone;
on it hang a thousand shields,
all of them shields of warriors.
Your breasts are like two fawns,
like twin fawns of a gazelle
that browse among the lilies.
Until the day breaks
and the shadows flee,
I will go to the mountain of myrrh
and to the hill of incense.
You are altogether beautiful, my darling;
there is no flaw in you. Song of Songs 4:1-7
A love song of its time. A love song celebrating a natural beauty. Drawing on inspiration from the natural world.
Eyes like doves, hair like goats, teeth like shorn sheep, lips like a scarlet ribbon, temples like halves of a pomegranate, neck like a tower, breasts like fawns….
Altogether perfect. Totally beautiful. Flawless.
Oh, to be loved like that. To be adored. To be treated as the most beautiful person in the whole world. The centre of the universe.
We may no use those particular comparisons any more, but those parts of the body do still draw attention (maybe no the temples). The amount of beauty products out there to make the most of our eyes, our hair, our teeth, our lips, our skin and our neck show that these areas still draw attention.
And then there are breasts. Breasts still draw attention, that’s for sure. For us women, breasts are just a part of who we are – many of us wish they were different and are not happy with them the way they are, but we do our best to present them adequately. A well-fitting bra is a must.
But men. Heterosexual men seem obsessed by breasts. They’re distracted by them. Breasts hold a certain fascination, it seems. But why? But why are men so infatuated with breasts?
Well, it seems this attraction to breasts is mostly down to biology. Males are programmed to find the female form attractive – they’re drawn to a woman’s lips, legs, eyes, hair and breasts. They are born that way.
The fact that breasts are usually well hidden adds to the thrill of course. Catching a glimpse of a breast is exciting. The promise of what is hidden being revealed.
Interestingly, this isn’t true across the rest of the natural world. Men are the only male mammals to have this sexual fascination for breasts. And women are the only female mammals whose breasts develop during puberty. And humans are the only species who stimulate breasts during sex.
It’s partly down to social conditioning, too. Boys learn from an early age that breasts are something they should be interested in. They’re conditioned by the men around them, the media, advertising. This appreciation of the female form becomes deeply ingrained in the brain.
In fact, research indicates that when we’re confronted with breasts, or even breast-related stimuli, like bras, we’ll start making bad decisions. Huffington Post
There are lots of theories out there about the biological reasons behind this fascination, but the most compelling is the most obvious: breast-feeding.
A baby stimulates a mother’s breasts to release oxytocin which releases milk. This release of oxytocin causes a mother to become focused on her baby. The baby has her full attention. The mother and baby gaze adoringly into each others’ eyes. Oxytocin and dopamine make this nurturing a pleasurable experience, so that she will want to keep on doing it and the baby will continue to get the nourishment it needs. This creates a very special bond between mother and baby.
So when a partner touches or kisses a woman’s breasts, it cause the same chemical reaction (without the milk). It makes the woman focus on her partner and a deep bond is created. Face to face sex (which is rare in any other animal on the planet) creates this intimate bond as we look into each others eyes (this is why our bottoms are not as colourful as a baboon’s. We do not need to attract a mate with our bottoms and some would say the shape of breasts mimics the shape of buttocks to attract a mate from the front view).
So an attraction to breasts is the most natural thing in the world. It’s an evolutionary drive to activate the powerful bonding circuits that help keep couples together. (but that is no excuse not to keep your eyes on the road or not to concentrate on that business proposal, guys).
We are fearfully and wonderfully made, that’s for sure.
Of course, as a society, we have taken this very special thing and turned it into something commercial, something tainted. We have exploited this natural attraction.
It’s time to reclaim it and celebrate it for what it is – one of God’s ways to cement a relationship.
And in saying all this, I’m aware of all women out there for whom the whole breasts thing is a massive issue. All those countless women who have had to deal with the devastating effects of breast cancer. This cancer is like no other cancer because it affects a woman at the core of her womanhood. Those of us who have not experienced this have no idea what kind of anguish that creates. We would do well to remember this.
