Because relationships matter most of all #9: more on love and hate

For this is the message you heard from the beginning: We should love one another. Do not be like Cain, who belonged to the evil one and murdered his brother. And why did he murder him? Because his own actions were evil and his brother’s were righteous. Do not be surprised, my brothers and sisters, if the world hates you. We know that we have passed from death to life, because we love each other. Anyone who does not love remains in death. Anyone who hates a brother or sister is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life residing in him.

This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters. If anyone has material possessions and sees a brother or sister in need but has no pity on them, how can the love of God be in that person? Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth.

This is how we know that we belong to the truth and how we set our hearts at rest in his presence: If our hearts condemn us, we know that God is greater than our hearts, and he knows everything. Dear friends, if our hearts do not condemn us, we have confidence before God and receive from him anything we ask, because we keep his commands and do what pleases him. And this is his command: to believe in the name of his Son, Jesus Christ, and to love one another as he commanded us. The one who keeps God’s commands lives in him, and he in them. And this is how we know that he lives in us: We know it by the Spirit he gave us.  1 John 3:11-24

If we didn’t get all this the first time when John opens up this conversation about love and hate earlier in the letter – we discussed it in Because relationships matter most of all #4: no room for hate if you want to remind yourself – he repeats himself here. These points are worth repeating as they are the foundation of the way in which the believers should be living out their faith. If he’s having to repeat it, I guess loving each other is something that these early believers are finding really hard. That should be no surprise to us because it’s something we find hard as a group of believers too, isn’t it?

And yet there are no exceptions. We are called to love every person we encounter with the love that God has so freely lavished upon each one of us.

We should love one another. That is how we were created: to live in community and harmony with one another. And yet after the Fall, when humans decided to go their own way instead of God’s, something changed. Jealousy and rivalry crept in; hatred took a hold – and like the example of Cain, rage and murderous thoughts and actions changed everything. We are all now flawed, we have to accept that. Love is not always (often) the most natural and immediate response, especially if we are wronged or overlooked or undervalued. Loving one another is really hard if we do not feel we have been loved well enough ourselves. It takes a lot to be the bigger person. And often, we don’t want to. Why should we?

Because God requires it of us, that’s why.

Loving each other is to be the sign of our faith. Without that, our faith is nothing at all. And love is not just a feeling or nice words; love requires action too. Saying the right thing is not enough. We are called to love in practical ways, to share what we have, to meet the physical needs of others. This is a requirement of our faith, not an option. Jesus loved so much that he gave up his life – what are we prepared to give up in love?

If we look at the state of our hearts and find love there, that is the only way to find confidence before God and rest in His presence. And that means love for ourselves and for others, remember. That is what it looks like to be at the centre of His will. There, our desires will be aligned with what God knows is best for us and as we pray for His will to be done, we will find the answers we need. God’s spirit at work in us reassures us of our position in Him.

We are safe; we are loved; we have everything we need.

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